Lover's Key, Florida

Lover's Key, Florida
I WILL FIND OTHER SEAS.

Saturday, January 7, 2012

COMFORT AND PEACE



You are the greatest
of my earthly blessings
is what she said
to me
on that warm April night
when we first tasted love
at its fullest.

Even now
when she is the greatest
of my heavenly blessings
those words
those memories
bring comfort and peace.

John A. Bayerl, January 7, 2012

Tonight I am tired, but, for the first time in  a long time, at peace.  Earlier this evening I attend a Polish Mass here in town.  Gwen's dad was Polish, and I have so many memories of attending Midnight Mass with her and her family and hearing all those beautiful Polish Christmas hymns.  Hearing them again tonight, sung by a superb choir, brought Gwen to my side, and tears to my eyes.  Then, on the way home, I was at peace.

On Monday it will be one year since I began writing this blog.  My intent has always been to honor Gwen first and foremost, and I have done that as best I could.  What has surprised me has been how therapeutic it has been to write.  That, and the discovery of so many people, literally around the world, who are willing to give of their time, and their love,  to read and respond to what I've written.  

Tonight at church, Dear, I could feel you near me, looking all cute in your Christmas finery.  Part of the peace I found later was in realizing that few people have been given the gift of a life together that had so many beautiful moments to remember and savor.   I will always have a hole in my heart where you should be, but I will also try to be grateful that you filled my heart so completely.


1 comment:

Susie Hemingway said...

This post pleased me beyond compare. It appears from your words you are more accepting and peaceful and gaining blessings from all your wonderful memories of dear Gwen. Of course it will never be easy and over the festive holiday, moments filled our hearts with such profound need. But dear man we are doing well and I am so happy to read this lovely verse of yours with good positive thoughts. Yes writing does help - it got me through the last five years without my 'shouting at the world' I am sure I would have succumbed - Peace and blessings John.