We walk by faith

It's another rainy Monday.  I'm beginning to like them; life gets simpler, it seems, when options are limited.

One of the things I loved most about Gwen was that she tried always to be busy doing things that were worthwhile.  While writing this I leaned back and closed my eyes for a moment.  I then felt Gwen's presence in the chair across from me; she was knitting something.  It's comforting when I am made aware of how thin the veil is that separates us.

I'm reminded again of something she once wrote in a letter to me: "I don’t know what I’d do without you for the rest of my life. I love you, and need to be with you always."  At the time those words were written they were her way of telling me how much she cherished what we called the miracle of our love.  Now, although it is I who am made to wonder what I will do without her for the rest of my life, I believe that she is with me always, as promised.

One of the blessings in all of this is that it forces me to seriously consider things that until now I had only given passing assent.  Things like; love lives on forever.  Each day that passes strengthens my conviction that Gwen is with me and encouraging me to continue doing things that matter.  And, certain events have recently transpired in my life that lead me to believe that she has a hand in them.  Sometimes I think about the wisdom of putting this out there for the whole world to see, and I imagine that there are those who will see it as delusional--I know that I would; if I didn't know better.

It is so comforting when I feel you near me, Dear; I don't know what I would do without you for the rest of my life.