Lover's Key, Florida

Lover's Key, Florida
I WILL FIND OTHER SEAS.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Mixed Feelings

Today was another eventful day.  Golf league all morning; I wasn't really into it today although I played well.  The lessons are beginning to pay off.

All day I have had this sad feeling, it's funny how there are days like that, the sadness just overwhelms me at times.  I miss what Gwen and I had.  Anyway, I was further saddened to hear from Gary, a friend I graduated from high school with and also attended NMU with him.  He told about last Saturday, two days after his wife and he had celebrated their 49th wedding anniversary, he came home from a day of playing golf and found his wife lying dead on the bedroom floor. I can't say what he is going through, only that it hurts in ways that one could not have imagined.  I'll try to call him soon.

I did get some gardening done, and enjoyed it.  My newly befriended neighbor, Robin, was out in her garden again, and we had a nice chat.  Brother Dick had suggested that I convert a little more sod into a flower garden and that is what I did, planting some pretty little red and white Vinca.  Now, it's just a matter of time until all the newly planted flowers get established and begin to show off.

This afternoon I also made some good progress on a Power Point for the class at NMU later this month.  I'ts staring to fall into place nicely.

This evening I had been invited to the Cancer Support Community for a concert by someone named Charlie Lustman, a cancer survivor who writes and plays inspirational songs.  It is always hard going back to the Cancer Support Community, Gwen and I spent many enjoyable hours there, and made many friends, and there are so many memories.  But, as it turned out, I was so glad that I decided to go.  Several of our friends were there, and it was good seeing them.  Also, quite by chance, I encountered the parents of a former student at Huron High who were very complimentary to me about how much I had helped their daughter.  The concert itself was very nice; at one point he played some music and invited us to do some guided imagery, which I always find helpful.  The best part was when I took myself back to Oregon when Gwen and I enjoyed camping in our tent at the ocean.  I visualized our two young children then, John and Jeanne, being tucked away in their sleeping bags and sound asleep,   and then  Gwen and I sharing a sleeping bag--how peaceful and relaxing that was, all of it, the sound of the waves rolling in on the Pacific Ocean, the smell of the pines, and the pure bliss of being in the arms of the one I loved.

This Wednesday is June 8, our wedding anniversary.  It would have been 48 years.  More about that tomorrow, all I know now is that I am sad each time I think about it.  How we waited for that day to arrive.  I did have  Mass said for Gwen's intention, and will attend that and do some other things to commemorate that happiest of days.  Now, there's a load of clothes in the dryer waiting to be folded.

Thank you, Dear, for paying me that visit in the sleeping bag.

1 comment:

A Myeloma Widow's Journey said...

So many feelings today, John. Happy you ended with your sleeping bag memories.