Today I came upon an old VHS video taken back in the 1990s. It contained two hours of memories, some of our family and some of a trip Gwen and I took to Windy Lake Lodge in Canada. The Gerichs joined us for the winter adventurer in the Agawa Canyon. The last part of the tape was of Christmas, 1989, at our home on Eli in Ann Arbor. One particularly poignant scene has Gwen and me comfortably sharing an easy chair while our four children did an impromptu showing of "Christmas Loot." I think Dick will help me get that put on a CD so that I can share it with our children. It is another reminder of my good fortune in finding a perfect match in Gwen, and my grief at losing her is matched by the joy in recalling the good times we shared.
Tomorrow is Father's Day, of course I'll miss my sweetheart pampering me a bit and promising the same gift she gave each year. Our children have been particularly caring toward me, and tomorrow evening John, Amy and Brooke have invited me to dinner. I think that will be the end of a gauntlet of days to be marked and mourned: beginning with Mother's Day, then my birthday, followed by our anniversary and the seven month commemoration of Gwen's death. Also in there were John's birthday and Anne's birthday.
I'll spend tomorrow getting ready for my trip to the U. P. next week and call that my Father's Day celebration. It will be another step toward getting on with whatever my life will be without Gwen--she knew about it and was pleased that I would have an opportunity to do what I love.
I have to quit now, my heart and soul just aren't functioning real well tonight and there's not much coming out of my brain. I try to write something each day, but, although I will have my computer with me next week, there may be days when I won't have a chance to publish this blog.
I lit up the grill and cooked some salmon for dinner tonight. It was such a perfect evening that I decided stay in the back yard to eat. The food was good, the rest of it pretty much sucked. I'm getting accustomed to eating alone like that, Dear, but I will never learn to like it.
Tomorrow is Father's Day, of course I'll miss my sweetheart pampering me a bit and promising the same gift she gave each year. Our children have been particularly caring toward me, and tomorrow evening John, Amy and Brooke have invited me to dinner. I think that will be the end of a gauntlet of days to be marked and mourned: beginning with Mother's Day, then my birthday, followed by our anniversary and the seven month commemoration of Gwen's death. Also in there were John's birthday and Anne's birthday.
I'll spend tomorrow getting ready for my trip to the U. P. next week and call that my Father's Day celebration. It will be another step toward getting on with whatever my life will be without Gwen--she knew about it and was pleased that I would have an opportunity to do what I love.
I have to quit now, my heart and soul just aren't functioning real well tonight and there's not much coming out of my brain. I try to write something each day, but, although I will have my computer with me next week, there may be days when I won't have a chance to publish this blog.
I lit up the grill and cooked some salmon for dinner tonight. It was such a perfect evening that I decided stay in the back yard to eat. The food was good, the rest of it pretty much sucked. I'm getting accustomed to eating alone like that, Dear, but I will never learn to like it.
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